“Love means to commit oneself without guarantee,
to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person. Love is an act of faith, and whoever is of little faith is also of little love.”

My parents just came back from China recently.
My external family from my father's side all went to this village in China
where my great grandparents and cousins and all are.
Like holy shit.
Cos my grandpa is from China.
But stayed in Msia most of his life.
It was interesting.
Mummy told me EVERYBODY in the village has the surname Ng
and all of em welcomed my family when they arrived,
preparing all the village delicacies and
tried their best to make sure they feel just like home.

Mummy bought an Anna Sui pouch for me LOLLOL
probably fake but still pretty cute. ^^

I just realised that BYSI's clothes are very suitable for my taste in clothes!
The colours, and everything.
SO CHIO!!
K random I know.

-----------------------------------------

So, people have been talking about me... about my relationship and all,
and honestly,
I am disgusted and sick of them.

I honestly dont know what they want from me.
What reaction do they want to trigger out from me when they insult me.
So hypocritical.

You accuse me of judging someone before I even know them?
Everybody judges, including you.
Arent you judging me as well?
Do you even know me?
And even if you do, how much do you actually KNOW me?

I know myself well enough to not trust people easily and
not open up to others so readily unless you are really reliable.

And if I actually did trust you and open up to you,
and let you see the real me,
you should know then know me well enough
to know I would never say or do what you accuse me of doing.

This is pointless, I know.
Explaining to those who already bear grudges on me for God Knows Why.
But like any other human who have been accused of wrongly,
I just want to say my side of the story.

Honestly though,
I hope these bunch of people are truly just strangers
or superficial acquaintances who don't know me
because if they were my friends,
I would be devastated to know that I have met such
horrid, insensitive people and had let them into my life.



Malcolm and I were over since about 3-4 months ago,
and I have since moved on.
No, there is no 3rd party involved. -.-
Both of us just felt we have really different plans for the future
and I realised I cannot accept some parts of him fully no matter how hard I try.
The end.
Thats it.
Is there really a lot to talk about?
Sheesh.
There were no regrets.
I'm just happy to know that I have loved and was loved back.
It was nobody's fault.
If both of us can accept OUR breakup and move on,
staying as friends,
who are you to insult any of us?
I mean, I dont get it.

I had let somebody very special into my life now,
and I am very happy with life.
With love.

I MOVED ON.
FACE IT.


Sorry, I'm no longer the girl who broods about the past 24/7
and feels sorry about myself
and whines and cries
and bitches about everything to everybody about my sad life.

Sorry if I didnt feel emo as long as you wanted me to be.

If I had felt emo,
people will hate me for asking for sympathy and attention and being too desperate.
If I move on,
people will call me an insensitive whore.

WTHECK?


I am just like every single one of you,
believing in true love, and constantly searching for it,
holding out and being strong until then.
I have been waiting,
walking the streets of earth until dawn.
There’s got to be someone for me.
It’s not too much to ask.
Just someone to be with.
Someone to love.
Someone to give everything to.
Someone who is amazing enough to be worthy of all that.
And I've found him.
The feeling is overwhelming.
The chemistry, his personality, everything feels so right.
And nothing is going to stop me.
I throw my whole body, my soul into the fall,
into love, into him.
I can’t help it, I love and then think about how I’ll pick up my bones later.


I'm not going to brood over my past love and sit there,
wasting my previous time.
I'm just not like that.
Time waits for nobody.


To love.
To be loved.
To never forget your own insignificance.
To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you.
To seek joy in the saddest places.
To pursue beauty to its lair.
To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple.
To respect strength, never power.
Above all, to watch.
To try and understand.
To never look away.
And never, never, to forget.

Moving on.

Watched SALT with Amelia some time ago,
and ANGELINA JOLIE IS DAMN HOT!!



I MISS YOU AMELIA MEET UP SOON YOUR O LVLS ARE OVERRRRRR


Till then.

Myself HAAHHAHAAHAH
Good skin complexion
Catfights
Laughing/Smiling madly at someone
Giving the finger
Helping anything/anyone
My besties
Family
My bitchy friends

Fake friends
Flirts
Those emo screamo songs that makes ur ears burst with all their yucky screaming
Nagging from my parents or from anybody else
Liars
Being alone
the dark
Being forgotten
Being ignored
Being neglected
Being unappreciated
People who dont care about others but themselves
Promise breakers
People who tell me to do things that I don't wanna do
PIMPLES AND ACNES
Scars
Cockroaches and worms

A homemade candlelight dinner/picnic for two on the beach!
Cuddling at home and watching a rented dvd together and eating popcorn
Buying tons of balloons, write our wishes there, and let em go.
Everlasting love
Two more piercings
Pass coming piano exams
Get rid of my eye bags!
New PSP battery!!!
More vintage clothes!
Maintain my GPA of 3.5
Get into University
Colourful clothes!
Rachel K makeup products!


FOR MY NEW VICTORIAN BEDROOM!
Queen Sized Victorian Bed!
Victorian Bed curtains!
Victorian Dressing table!
Victorian vanity table!!
Mosquito net curtains!
Victorian floral curtain holders!
Victorian lamp/chandelier!
Scented candles/oils!
Victorian tea set!
Victorian boxes for my stuff!
PAINTINGS!!
Victorian clock!!
Any more recommendations to add in? :s Suggest some to me! Haha.
Please santa, I'm a good girl this year.