I am deeply in love with you.

I remember the first time I met you in person at East Coast Park.
I got lost (as usual) and when I saw you in a distance,
you looked up at me and gave me such an adorable grin.
You brought me to eat at 126 (my first ever time there),
and decided to share a main course and appetizer
since both of us arent very hungry.
We talked, and laughed, and I KNEW we had chemistry.
We both know it but didnt wanna say it out loud.
There was crazy chemistry between us,
and I dont know why but I cannot look into your eyes
because they penetrate deep into my soul,
and it makes me a little scared...
to feel so so naked infront of someone I just met.

While I was reserving seats for the movie later using my iPhone,
I realised you were deeply staring at me.
I looked up and expected you to look away.
But you didnt.
Your fixed gaze still on me.
My heart leapt.
The tension grew and for a moment (which felt like it lasted for years),
there was dead silence between us.
Time stopped.
Your gaze was hypnotizing to me.
It pulled me in.
I fought it off and looked away.
We both knew, then, that the chemistry between us was no joke.
I WAS TERRIFIEDDDDD
I have never felt such deep chemistry for anyone before.
Just then, I bit into a pretty big chicken bone (wtf I was probably too distracted when I put it into my mouth)
and I had to spit it out.
And you stretched out your hand,
palm faced up just below my chin,
and told me to spit it onto your bare palm.

I said no, and you insisted,
and so I spit it out.
LOLLLLLLLLL
But at that moment,
I knew you care about me.
You dont give shit about the way I talk,
the way I dress,
how I look,
how I eat.
I knew then, I can be myself when I'm infront of you.
You love it.
You love me.



When the bill came,
I insisted on going dutch and gave 20bucks to you.
You stared at me for a moment and burst out laughing so hard.
Oh. My god.
That laugh.
I love it.
So so much.
That deep throaty, hearty laughter
warms my heart so much.
You let me take a glance at the bill,
and it was a whooping 100+.
and I was like WTFFF WHY SO EXPENSIVE!!?!?
And you just kept on laughing, and said,
"Keep your 20."
When I persisted although I knew 20bucks
doesnt really make a difference to the whole bill,
you said,
"20bucks doesn't make me a rich man."

I looked up and you winked and gave me a lil grin
and immediately began laughing at me again.

While we were wasting time at Starbucks before the movie,
you told me to get an ice cappuccino for you,
and I got you a boiling hot one,
you didnt sound angry at all.
You just looked at me,
like how a father would look at his 3 yr old daughter when she had done something wrong,
and just brushed the whole matter off.

You played lil mind challenging games with me using coins,
and suddenly, you said,
"I give you another 5 minutes. If you cannot figure this game out,
you have to look straight into my eyes."
I lost, and after bargaining,
the deal was set.
I have to look into your eyes straight for 10 seconds.
It was more than enough to feel the deep chemistry between us.
We looked into each other's eyes,
and it was so overwhelming for both of us,
and I was so tempted to look away,
but you were calm, as usual,
and so is your gaze.
Raging passion smoldering beneath a composed surface.

You then said,
your tone serious for the first time in the whole evening,
"You are very beautiful."
My heart melted like crazzyyy.
But as usual, I denied and looked away.
You just kept on staring at me for iono how long,
and broke into a smile.



During the 2nd movie date,
you wanted to hold my hand
but I felt uncomfortable about the whole thing,
you didnt make me feel bad or anything.
You understood.
You were patient with me.
Instead, you hold your own hand
and started laughing heartily at yourself again for your own lame gesture.
I laughed at your silliness and snorted
and we both laughed even harder all the way till we go home
and continued laughing about it on the phone.


On the 3rd date,
when you gave me a bouquet of handwritten paper roses,
and told me how beautiful I was,
I was so so happy.
Initially, whenever you told me I'm very beautiful,



I didnt believe you.
I thought it was merely sugarcoated words.
Besides, I hear that from other guys before anyway.
But your gaze.
The way you looked at me like
how I am the most beautiful thing your eyes have ever laid on,
even though it looked as though I hadn’t brushed my hair in months.
And when you were walking me back to the mrt station,
at the traffic light junction,
we stared into each other's eyes,
and at that very moment,
around everybody,
in the hot sun,
both of us all sweaty,
it felt absolutely perfect.
And we kissed for the first time.
And I knew from that point on that you were the man I would spend my life loving.



From that moment on, I spend every second
just memorizing every part of your face,
every inch of your skin,
every word you’ve ever spoken to me.
All along falling more and more in love with you each passing minute.


I love sleeping over at your place.
Especially my second sleepover at your place on the night of Christmas Eve.



When I woke up randomly in the middle of the night and couldn't fall back to sleep,
I lay awake and watch you sleep.
Through the sliver of moonlight that spills across your face and onto the sheets,
I observe your peaceful slumber.
I closed my eyes and try and surrender myself to such a sleep.
But I can’t.
I sit up, and immediately your strong arm wrap itself around my waist
and pull me back down to the bed, right beside you.
FYI, this happened more than 3 times.
I was amazed and surprised that you can even sense I sat up despite you
sleeping so soundly.
I burrowed my way into your embrace.
I wiggle myself back until I am resting comfortably in your warm, soft nook.
As if by instinct your arms wrap around me and you let out a long, slow sigh.
Your soft breath tickles my neck, and your feet shift to try and warm mine.
Even while sleeping you are silently taking care of me.
I listen to the nothingness that surrounds us.
I am always amazed at the silence.
Where has the city gone?
Am I really the only one still awake?
My eyes have adjusted to the darkness.
I scan the piles of clothes, the silent computer
and the stacks of Polaroids we took together that reside around your room.

I try again to sleep.
I listen to your deep, steady breaths and try to match them.
First I’m too slow, then too fast.
Finally we breathe together.
In and out.
In and out.
I am suddenly aware of our hearts beating.
Can i convince our hearts to beat together simultaneously?
I relax and concentrate.
Breath for breath,
beat by beat;
like a metronome keeping time with our bodies
I wait until we’ve become one singular beating, breathing organism.
Are you aware of this synchronization, my love?
You in dreamland, me in reality.
I’m tempted to wake you up and ask about your dreams.
Was I there?
Could you feel me?

As I roll over to look at your face it starts to rain.
The drops ping and ting outside the window.
You’ve rolled onto your back now and our breaths have varied.
You let out a little snore, a mumble and your hand searches for me under the covers.
You settle on my right thigh and give it a little pat
before you relax back into your deep-breathing slumber.

My eyes are beginning to droop
and the room is turning fuzzy.
The wind roars outside the window,
but I am unaware of its cold breath as I lay contently entangled in your legs,
wrapped in your warmth,
in the middle of this long, December night.

I LOVE waking up next to you on weekend evenings
and walking to the local kopitiam with you in your teeshirt and shorts
and resting my head on your chest
while teaching me life lessons and reassure me ever so patiently and gently,
and me listening to your heartbeat.
Beating for me.
I love the way you stare hard into space
when you’re thinking really hard about something.
I love the way you lie beside me when I sleep.
I love your laugh and your hazel brown eyes.
I love the way you start talking really fast when you get excited telling a story.
I love how crazy our chemistry is until now.
I feel that we are truly a whole.

I love you and every single thing about you.
I always will.
You’ve taught me how to live.
But I don’t want to live without you.
I wanna have crazy adventures with you all around the world.
I wanna go grocery shopping with you.
I wanna sit at the mall and share a sinful milkshake with you
as we watch all the people from all different walks of life
pass by each other and bless each other about how lucky we are
to have met each other and fell in love.
I wanna watch late night TV cartoons with you
and hug your arm and shower kisses to you.
I wanna take you to my favorite museums.
I wanna marry you and have babies with you
and experience everything this life has to offer with you
and grow old and grey and wise with you.

You’re the love of my life spirit.

Myself HAAHHAHAAHAH
Good skin complexion
Catfights
Laughing/Smiling madly at someone
Giving the finger
Helping anything/anyone
My besties
Family
My bitchy friends

Fake friends
Flirts
Those emo screamo songs that makes ur ears burst with all their yucky screaming
Nagging from my parents or from anybody else
Liars
Being alone
the dark
Being forgotten
Being ignored
Being neglected
Being unappreciated
People who dont care about others but themselves
Promise breakers
People who tell me to do things that I don't wanna do
PIMPLES AND ACNES
Scars
Cockroaches and worms

A homemade candlelight dinner/picnic for two on the beach!
Cuddling at home and watching a rented dvd together and eating popcorn
Buying tons of balloons, write our wishes there, and let em go.
Everlasting love
Two more piercings
Pass coming piano exams
Get rid of my eye bags!
New PSP battery!!!
More vintage clothes!
Maintain my GPA of 3.5
Get into University
Colourful clothes!
Rachel K makeup products!


FOR MY NEW VICTORIAN BEDROOM!
Queen Sized Victorian Bed!
Victorian Bed curtains!
Victorian Dressing table!
Victorian vanity table!!
Mosquito net curtains!
Victorian floral curtain holders!
Victorian lamp/chandelier!
Scented candles/oils!
Victorian tea set!
Victorian boxes for my stuff!
PAINTINGS!!
Victorian clock!!
Any more recommendations to add in? :s Suggest some to me! Haha.
Please santa, I'm a good girl this year.